Geez, I never write in here.  I would first like to thank God for laughing gas, general anesthesia that is intravenously fed and Percocet. In that order please.  I had all four wisdom teeth pulled out yesterday and the pain I feel is very minimal.  Of course, the only problem is that I’m not feeling much at all.  However, I do say that is a small price to pay for making sure that one does not feel like someone took a hammer to both sides of his head.  Healing seems to be getting off on the right foot.  My face is tender and my face is slightly puffy.  I kind of like the fact that my cheeks are a little fatter, which obviously means I am doped up because I hate anything on me getting fatter.  Ass included thank you.  Talking isn’t the easiest thing to do because I can’t open my mouth all the way, (hence-this useless entry into my journal).  Although, the liquid diet forced upon me because of my condition is fabulous.  I can’t wait to fucking heal so I can eat the biggest slab of meat money can buy.

So updates.  I got a job.  Yessir, my life as a Paris Hilton wannabe is over.  No more waking up at 5PM.  No more 5 night party binges.  No more homemade videos.  (Pretend you didn’t read that).  The working world has labeled me a marketing coordinator by way of a construction management firm in Downtown San Diego.  I honestly got very lucky.  It’s a great position to be in at the moment because of the place the company is in right now.  They’ve recently been experiencing a large amount of growth and I’ve been hired to be part of a 3-person team to help build a communication department.  That’s pretty fucking great for kid just out of college. So why is it that the thing I’m most excited about is the fact that they cater lunch for all employees everyday.  Yessir.  Any way you want it, that’s the way you need it, any way you want it.  Just like Journey.  Anything you want, any place you want, all for free honey.  Yes girl, I said free 99.  A position with great growth potential and I’m doing cartwheels for the free food.  Oh my belly, my dearest love and greatest enemy.  Like Regina George, I wanna loose three pounds.  A dream that is both foolish and fleeting.  Is butter a carb?

I love Oprah Winfrey

I’ve said it many times before and I’ll say it again, Oprah is going to Heaven.  If you don’t already know, Oprah is just the most precious and giving woman on earth.   Oprah makes being 50 fabulous, she buys her own bling, she doesn’t need to be married to find happiness, white women want to be her and she is best friends with God.  And the girl is not cheap about what she gives away to her audience.  I nearly went into an emotional aneurism watching her favorite things show.  Never you mind what I would do with a woman’s Burberry coat and matching cashmere scarf.  The only thing that matters is that it’s free, costs way more money than I make in one workday and that it’ll sell fabulously on Ebay.  I’ll even wear a pink one out if you just promise to give me that flat screen TV.  Oprah loves teachers and teachers love Oprah, more so if she’s giving you a trip to a spa in Colorado that she, herself visits 3 times a year.  I cried like a little girl on her wildest dreams show when she bought and furnished a home for a woman with 9 children (3 hers biologically, 2 sets of 3 she took in so that they would not have to be sent to foster care and split up).  The kids went on a shopping spree at Toys-r-us and I cried out of happiness all through their shopping experience.  Shut-up.  I love Oprah and her favorite things.  God bless Oprah.